DWTS: Week 2

Derek Hough and Jennifer Grey are on track to run away with the mirror ball trophy. At this point, they are so far along that they've already had to whip out Jennifer Grey's 'cancer card' in order to dispel any notion that she has an unfair advantage due to the fact that she studied dance her entire life and was the star of one of the most popular dance movies of all time. We saw that she could waltz and now we know that she can still kick it into high gear and whip out a fierce Jive. Their Jive slowed down a bit, but the only part that bugged me was when she was on the ground while receiving her marks and again before the interviewed. Was she THAT out of breath? Bottle of water for the girl, anyone? Jennifer Grey is doing so well that if she was Kristi Yamaguchi, she'd have to start talking about how skating and dancing have little in common.

The highlight of Grey and Hough this week may have been the audience booing Sarah Palin when it came time for her to be interviewed by Tom Bergeron. Ms. Palin is quite the actress and played "Bristol enthusiast" throughout. The highlight of the entire show was when Sarah went to embrace Mark and thank him "for taking care of our girl." Mommy Dearest said, "what a bunch of phony baloney bullshit." Well said, but that doesn't mean I am not living for her in the audience. Sarah The Barracuda knew just when the camera was on her and was sure to mouth "oh, that was so good" to whichever daughter was with her in the audience. Was that Willow? Fern? Dandelion? I forget.



The judges said it best when they told Bristol that her actual dancing was adequate, but she needs to work on being able to present and entertain. Basically what they were telling her is to be more like her telegenic mother who lacks all substance but can still command attention. Sadly, Levi has yet to sit in the audience and attempt to woo her back. There is still time.


Audrina may be Tony's best partner yet, but I certainly prefer watching him dance with Kate Gosselin. Audrina has a body built for dancing, but I'm more interested in learning whether she is as dumb as she appeared on The Hills. Audrina was already crying about not seeing her boyfriend. They've barely been dancing for a month at this point. Their rehearsal time gets shorter and shorter every year. Get a grip! This is a relationship that will last...


In other news, Brandy went from front-runner to a bit of a hotter mess. My coworker is one fierce little Jewish princess and she was utterly annoyed by Brandy's mugging for the camera last week. Brandy is always SUPER EXITED or waaay too into nailing steps. Brandy is not competing against a Yamaguchi. There isn't that much to worry about. She is already fighting with Maks and tried to add some "I've dated 27 different rappers" to the Jive. It was NOT cute. There were moments during her solo when I could tell that she did indeed attend her prom with Kobe Bryant. Maks may have met his match in terms of attitude. The producers have done their job with regards to creating must-see drama.

"Your approach is very asshole sometimes."


Bruno said it best when he said that Michael Bolton's JIve was the worst in show history. The odd moment came when Len tried to debate him. Is Len attending his concerts with my mother? My enmity for Chelsie grows every week. She had Michael Bolton in a dog house with a bone in his mouth. Just no. Chelsie, you've voted off the island. And take Lacey with you. The two of you won't be missed.


The Situation is one pigeon-toed mofo and his days may be numbered. He shouldn't be too upset over it, as it appears that he's never seen the show before.


Florence Henderson looks like she is going to be a survivor this season. The 76-year-old-potty-mouthed sex pot is seriously entertaining to watch. Her fluff pieces alone are worth keeping her on the show.



Kyle Massey's Quickstep may have been more of a Jive, but his "two dances in one" might just have been more to love.


Margaret Cho may just have survived another week, but it has become plainly obvious who the top performers will be. While it will be Derek and Jennifer all the way, this season will be all about the drama. This campy hot mess is delivering yet again.