Friday, February 11, 2011

This and That Part Duex

Yu-Na Kim is feeling ready for the World Championships.  Her technical elements will be the same as last season, but she is really focusing on artistry and presentation.  It remains to be seen whether not competing at Four Continents as a warm-up event will hurt Yu-Na and her team.  She hasn't skated in front of an audience since All That Skate LA, not even at her rink's Christmas show.  Yu-Na's programs at Worlds serve as her latest marketing effort to make Koreans fall in love with her again and forget that she gets the hell out of dodge when it comes time to prepare for competitions.  Yu-Na really appreciates her country's support, just as long as she doesn't have to train or compete on home ice.

Cheryl Burke's memoir hits bookstores next week.  I can't wait to hear about how competitive she really is!  Yuki Saegusa represents so many fierce Asians!  (Not to mention Evan Lysacek, who fake bakes enough to obtain that Asian hue.)

Ina and Zimmerman are going to be replacing Sale and Pelletier in certain cities on SOI.  Kudos to John Zimmerman's hotness.  As always, look out for Kyoko's bitchy glares if John makes a mistake.  We can only hope that they will confirm whether or not Marlie and other current stars will be guest-starring on the tour after the World Championships.  The skaters have joined for the last few years, but SOI has really convinced themselves that by bringing back Gordeeva and Browning, they have a whole new tour with a mix of young and old.  It remains to be seen whether or not it has translated into ticket sales.  I'd really like to buy my tickets, but I'm holding out a tad until Marlie is added.  I'd like Jeff Buttle to be added too, as he was quite popular in the US during the 2008-2009 tour.  Unfortunately, a few old times are clogging the performance fees and spots on the tour. In an effort to make the hottest ice show ever, I'd like to see the top skaters..,whether American or Canadian.  I wouldn't mind seeing three dance teams if they were awesome.  Times have changed and the SOI formula needs to catch up.

Lindsay Lohan may be an evil thieving wench, but she set off Fashion Week by making the career of Kimberly Ovitz.  Her $575 Glavis Albino is the hottest new dress.  While it may be inappropriate for court, the bitch looked fierce and the dress is selling out everywhere it is available.  If the financially-troubled star had any business sense, she'd make a deal to receive a portion of the proceeds from whatever she wears to court, as the exposure is making this young designer's career.  Lindsay clearly doesn't take court too seriously, so she might as well make a fashion statement any way she can.  This dress is certainly better than her own lines of leggings and self-tanner.
The Cal Gymnastics Women's team has been saved.  Unfortunately, the team is a non-entity and has been so for a long time.  The team has been saved due to the school's non-compliance with Title IX rules.  The Cal's men's team is the actual team deserving of being kept, but the program is being cut due to the need for equal representation for men and women.  Both teams were going to be cut, but they have reinstated the women's team due to the non-compliance issue was raised (even though they're claiming it isn't the case.)  Sadly, men's gymnastics may very well be a club sport in another decade.  The number of programs still around is so minimal that it risks losing its status as an NCAA sport.  The school is being non-committal about seriously funding the women's team, which means it will likely remain a team that UCLA puts its C-string gymnasts up against and still kicks the shit out of.  If Cal wants to make something of their program, they need a young, energized staff to make something out of it.  I agree with Title IX overall, but it remains sad that the need of schools to have enormous football teams has cut out the ability to finance men's gymnastics when they also have to provide equal representation for female sports.

Make sure your rink uses an electric Zamboni, as recent investigations are showing that rinks have dangerous levels of carbon monoxide.  Only three states regulate the levels of carbon monoxide in ice rinks.  Carbon Monoxide may be the reason why all of Tom Z's students are slow and as boring as listening to Ben Stein's voice.

Peter Vidmar is excited for the Year of the Handstand, USAG's latest worthless marketing promo.  In order to ensure future success in the sport, USAG really needs a 'year of the el grip.'

Bridget Sloan is taking all of her official visits despite being pretty set on becoming a Gym Dog.  UGA desperately needs her and Jay has developed a clear connection with Bridget.  He probably took a cue from Suzanne's book and mentioned how they train fewer hours than the other teams.  Bridget would have to train much harder than she likes to in order to be the team star at Florida.  Sloan is currently visiting Blahtah this weekend and has already visited Georgia and Florida.  She is set to go to college after the 2012 Olympics, which she has little shot of making.

Alicia Sacramone on Behind The Team.

Sexy Kevin and Andrew Atherton were interviewed at Cirque du Soleil Headquarters, where they are training for IRIS.  Both were members of the British National Gymnastics Team and cast members of the Fire Within series, which documented the creation of Varekai.  Both are close friends with Head Cirque Diva Stella Umeh.


  1. You're so pleasant today.

    Sloan's second Olympic chance depends upon the ability of the others to do floor/bars. With Caquatto doing college gymn, there are only two girls left from World Team Finals bar lineup, one of which is Sloan. We're waiting on comeback girls to see if they bar situation can improve, so Sloan can't be counted out. She's also potentially valuable on FX and her DTY is usuable in Prelims. I could see her squeaking on to the World team again this year if healthy.

    Kyoko Ina back with John Zimmerman... That's interesting since it sounded like she was done with him dropping her or whatever. I bet that one trick they fell on will not be in their programs. ha

  2. I think Cheryl Burke's book will probably suck. She's not even 30, and she competes on DWTS which is a made-for-TV cheesefest. What adversity could their have possibly been for her to overcome? Yawn.

  3. Cheryl's book could be decent at least...she is someone who managed to be one of the stars of a cultural phenomenon and has struggled with her weight in the media spotlight.

  4. "Carbon Monoxide may be the reason why all of Tom Z's students are slow and as boring as listening to Ben Stein's voice."

    AJ, you ARE the best!

  5. Originally I thought Sloan would be torn between Florida & UCLA for the warm weather. The latter also has the "coolness" factor that someone from the midwest that has always lacked it would be wanting. Then again, she's so mellow that Utah seems like the better fit. But, Sloan also loves football so to maximize that college experience she'd have to go to a football powerhouse - Alabama (or FL). So who knows! Aren't heavily recruited athletes warned not get attached to specific coaches and modes of training because those factors can always be fluid (i.e. coaches retiring, quiting, fired). What a great time this must be for her!

  6. Pollyanna alert @4:30!

  7. "(Not to mention Evan Lysacek, who fake bakes enough to obtain that Asian hue.)"

    You're joking. Burnt orange? Asian hue? Hell no.

  8. Damn, Yuna looks good with eyelid surgery, she didn't have dbl eyelid before. Koreans have plastic surgery like it's nothing

  9. You mean one of those hilariously bitter Japanese skating fans who made that crazy YouTube vid pointing out all of the plastic surgery Yuna's supposedly had - is telling the truth?

    First Johnny's memoir, now Cheryl's - I need a Kindle!