Sunday, August 5, 2012

Live Blog: Primetime Coverage


Does anyone believe Michael Phelps is really done for good?! He is a competitor and I never trust any are gone for good. Let's hope he takes this time to fix the class three underbite. Is anyone else oh so glad he comes out of this far more successful than Ryan Lochte? It was a rather classy interview with Phelps who says he, "got what he deserved."(Good and Bad.)

Watching women's 3m springboard. Christina Loukas wants a gold, but her legs are wide apart on that reverse pike. Wu Minxia is my girl. Oh so fierce. Tania Cagnotto is rather lovely as well. Everyone loves an underdog, but I like to see a master deliver their absolute best. Wu Minxia is DIE for. Why must the female American springboard divers always look capable of eating the Chinese outside of the pool? It is not helping their splash. The Chinese should just...always be diving. Fast forwarding through Shawn Johnson's commercials is one of life's true joys.




"The women's springboard team, they are large...but the water polo team...now THEY are cows. One of them looked like she could eating the entire Fab Five for dinner and STILL be hungry."-WestPalmBitch


As we wait for gymnastics, let's take a moment to celebrate this Olympic moment from Team USA.

Laura Sanchez is lovely!!

Gold for Wu!!!

Is anyone else still recovering from Serena Williams' crip walk? That was just...an Olympic moment. I cannot.

I'm relieved the beach volleyball players are basically naked again. I have zero use for them otherwise.

"Mary Carrillo is just..."-Father Knows Best
"She is marred, you know."-AJ
"What's her name?"-FKB
"It's a he."-AJ
"Now I've heard it all."-FKB

"Mary looks somewhat feminine with extra eyeliner."-WestPalmBitch

Track is on...I love watching and guessing which ones will first be convicted of using steroids. That seventh-place finisher, he will always wind up being the Olympic Champion.

These sprinters need to run faster...we have a vault final with TWO Canadians and another girl deliberately trying to kill herself.

NBC is hateful for delaying gymnastics. I could be watching other things. I skated for three hours today and we all know the results.

Let's take a moment and rewatch this wonderful feature on Kerri Strug and the Mag 7 since NBC is failing us yet again.

Vault finals. Al acts like she has never stuck the vault before. She used to regularly stick it prior to this Olympic year. There are those looking to credit Gym Max for her success, yet she left for a reason and was utterly lacking in skills and difficulty when she left as a junior. AOGC raised her skill level and guided her through the senior ranks and last year of her junior career.

Maroney deserved a 10 the other night and frankly the publicity for the sport would've been outrageous. There is NO way Gabby or Raisman deserved to be any closer than six tenths to her.

We will be seeing a lot of Janine Berger in the future. Let's hope she learns to clean up the form and technique, because that is some nasty Jana-Bieger shit.

NBC is skipping over the Canadians. If only the judges had the luxury to do the same.

Ellie Black Kmetko...that is just tough to watch.

This was the ugliest vault final ever seen. Honestly, the hungover NCAA girls look better chucking vaults they don't train in event finals.

Maroney is higher than Kohei in the air...amazing.

Yamilet Pena Abreu- Personally, I do not support her even being in the finals. She clearly cannot do the vault well. When you're planning to fail...

It is ridiculous that the women can start their runs over but the men cannot. Gymnastics really makes no sense.

The fact that Tim is yelling how much Pena's vault is..."well, it wasn't complete shit this time!" The girl never extends her legs off the horse and can't tuck properly. The technique is all wrong.

One really needs to question if they should be allowed to have a touch warm up for event finals. It is clearly different in the training gym vs. the podium and these girls all looked capable of seriously hurting themselves. The level of difficulty is increasing far too quickly to cut corners over time or whatever ridiculous motives they may have. The TV networks always used the warm up to narrate the scene and build the tension and excitement. Seeing someone fall in the warm up and hit during the meet is what drama is made for.

"Waiting for Maroney is like watching Titanic. You hope that it ends differently, but you know the boat is going to sink."-Dedicated Reader

Oksana Chusovitina...I'm glad she is wearing earrings to show a degree of femininity. Low and shitty rudi. The form is just deteriorating by the year. We all love and support her, but we have given her 'victory lap' medals far too many times. Just didn't land those vaults well. So much respect for her. Cannot believe it if she is really done.

Maria Paseka---I think it is time that the FIG starts getting stricter about downgrading Amanars that are not fully twisted. Shawn Johnson, Paseka and Raisman have all gotten away with murder at times. It is clearly dangerous to undertwist the vault. Nice Layout Pod after the pre-flight. It is so weird seeing Russians celebrate bronze medal efforts.

Tim keeps saying McKayla is a lock for gold as though he doesn't know the outcome. It doesn't make this any easier. NBC has been building up Maroney for thirty minutes.

Shawn Johnson is now pretending it is Beijing again in her Coca-Cola commercial.

Maroney---Her arm absolutely had an issue like I thought earlier. If you watch the left arm on the block it was a bit outside of where it usually is. Note that she even has slight slack of the knees...and still in-fucking-credible.

"Watching this coverage is a slow death. I don't want to see what's coming."-Uschi Keszler

The second vault fall is still shocking, yet not when she never gets the same bounce on the second vault. She truly didn't need it. Kyla Ross' shock is a perfect description of the moment.

"Rose just let go."-Dedicated Reader

Sandra Izbasa...ugh. The Romanians just get warmed up in time for event finals. Layout mustafina in the tuck position.

"Izbasa looks constipated in the air."-Uschi Keszler

It is so sad when you can win an event final gold medal with not even executing either vault particularly well. Simona Amanar in Atlanta she is not.

BIG hop back.

I love Izbasa, but this is difficult to celebrate for a myriad of reasons.

Team USA is treating this like a death...which it truly is.

Maroney is in utter shock, yet seems like the type of girl who will be totally fine.

Is Izabasa consoling Maroney?!

Please relive the wonderful caption that was originally posted under this photograph:

Maroney misses vault gold and a chance to meet Kate Middleton.

The lesson of today is to never. ever. EVER. wear white leotards.

"Double amputee should try gymnastics. I'd love to see that floor routine."-Uschi Keszler

---"Aw, he is last. I guess legs are helpful after all."

I believe we are all in need of an epic palate cleanser:



"I realized how silly it was for Dawes to freak out about having to change her website about being the only African-American gold medalist AFTER Gabby won AA...she would've had to change it after team gold."-Uschi Keszler

36 comments:

  1. I think everyone is happy Phelps did better than Lochte. As much as NBC tried to make the story happen, there can be only one Battle of the Brians.

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  2. Ralph Lauren needs to make bigger suits for some of these water polo chicks esp. the good old American’s that sea cows suit is in jeopardy of being completely devoured by her ass

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  3. These runners always depress me. Also, first time post and long time stalker! Love this blog! I just turned on the Tv- I'm assuming I didn't miss the good stuff?

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  4. Al Trautwig acted like he was annoyed just to mention Gabby Douglas's name. Closet-case hack.

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  5. I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE your commentary!

    Also, I know the Amanar is as difficult and can't compare because it's a different family...BUT I still think the Produnova is most difficult. There's a reason nobody has successfully done it since Produnova herself.

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    1. of course the produnova is more difficult - that's why its start value is .6 higher than the amanar.

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  6. Seriously!! Shawn has turned out to be the biggest media whore EVER! At least Mary Lou ACTUALLY won the Gold in the AA

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    1. Michelle Kwan didn't win Gold in Olympic, but her publicity is by far beyond most of the gold medalist. The AA gold medal isn't represent the all.

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  7. Love mckayla so much. That was so painful to watch. Would love to see her be the 1st to rock a triple twisting yurchenko like she has talked about competing.

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  8. Thrilled for Sandra. Gutted for McKayla. Live for McKayla's bitchface and not hugging Paseka at the end. While kind of a bad sport, she still fucking rules.

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  9. That vault final was terrible! It is sad when Sandra Izbas wins with those two vaults. The form and control on both was poor! But there is not an argument to be made for anyone else to win! Maybe if McKayla had done the team finals vault, then maybe she should win even with the fall...

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  10. Maroney made that springboard her bitch during TF. Bummed that bitch slapped her back in event finals. I hope she continues for another Worlds.

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  11. Didn't Nastia's GORGEOUS beam set in finals LOSE to Shawn...wearing white?

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    1. Nastia, Jordyn and Gabby won their AA wearing pink. Nastia and Mckayla got second wearing white. So lesson here is #hotpink for the win and white is for losers. I guess we're stuck with #hotpink forever

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    2. I cannot believe I'm weighing in on this silliness but I just cannot resist... Shannon won her one and only individual Olympic gold on beam with classic Miller'esque perfection ... wearing white.

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  12. Maroney was not graceful in defeat, but that was a rough blow. Izbasa winning a gold for her tucked Mustafina and crappy DTY is depressing. Maroney looked like she was really feeling the pressure today.

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    1. I don't know, I actually really appreciated her reaction. Tough and sober, it seemed. Understood that she had screwed herself out of the gold, but wasn't going to have an all-out bratty cry-fest. Smiled when she had to, acknowledged people when she had to. I was impressed.

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    2. You could see her feeling the pressure just before she went for that 2nd vault. It wasn't her normal look of confidence. I don't think she was trying to be a bitch afterward though. I think she truly was in shock & totally pissed off at herself.

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  13. Yes, believe she was wearing white, and the most magnificent bitchface during the medal ceremony. Two, white is bad.

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  14. Hope this fuels the fire for McKayla. Perhaps next worlds or even in Rio 2016 we'll see a tty

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    1. I hope so too, the problem is why should USAG take a vault specialist again? She needs to work on her weaknesses and become a better all around gymnast. I would love for Mckayla to do some crazy new vault and become Olympic Champion. 4 years is a long time though

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    2. Dream on. Girl is as done as Madonna's last flop. There will be too much depth in the next quad to take an event specialist. Rio will be all about the new crop of Russians, maybe Komova and Mustafina. Definitely Grishina and Iordache too. Kayla Ross and Finnegan for Amerika in Rio!

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    3. To 8:08 PM I agree. They might as well have taken Elizabeth Price.

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    4. Agree with anon 8:10 with new code of points downgrading amanar to 6.3 and FX be scored higher with more artistry then ever before, the next Olympics will have no room for one event gymnastics.

      Luckily there is promise for mckayla on bars and beam but she needs to really clean it up. She also needs to tweak her floor.

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  15. Saw the vault finals real time. Oksana clearly looked tired and not invested. The girl from Dominica might contend in Brazil. Maroney was clearly rushing prior to each. That was the fugliest event final I have ever tuned into.

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  16. Ryan Seacrest is the most despicable person to ever walk this earth.

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  17. Kerri Strug and the Mag 7 Docu: WHY would they show that horrendous fall from Kerri's UB? Absolutely horrifying.
    Actually, they showed that same vid on Good Morning America a while ago, I was so unprepared to see that.
    It should have a disclaimer or something.

    Somebody tweeted that Bella sounds like the Muppets Swedish Chef.
    It so does.

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  18. Really bad VT EF.
    No people landing on their butts should be rewarded enough to be on the finals.

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    1. Bit of trivia... Falling in vault finals actually used to be pretty common, back when they required the 2 diff vaults for EF but not for qualifying... Sometimes a girl would make it in who didn't even have a 2nd vault!

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  19. Paseka should not have been credited with her amanar. It was worse than Shawn Johnson's. Why were the judges in 2010 down with downgrading shit, now they don't seem to care?

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    1. Seriously, that thing was the worst she's done.

      The vault judges have been useless this whole competition. They should all be fined.

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  20. Why couldn't Paseka perform better during TF? Ugh.

    Vika and Maroney can be friends tbh, bond over how they got silver when it should have been gold. I'm so gutted for both. Russia also needs to get better floor music so they can be more beautiful on floor.

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    1. Russia has the most beautiful music on floor IMO lol....this is coming from an American too. The Chinese have really nice music aswell. The Americans and Romanians seemed to have the worst music choices this olympics....Ponor and Douglas are first on my list.

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    2. When should Vika have gotten gold? I must have missed that competition....

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  21. Damn! Didn't see that one coming. I also hope she sticks it out for four more years. Or rather, takes a year or so of taking it easy, focusing on dance or bars stuff that's a little easier on her back... then come back in a few years with a tty and a better all-around repetoire and blows everyone away in Rio. I would pay some serious money to see that.

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