Monday, May 21, 2012

The Grand Prix Assignments




Today's events shall be referred to as Fifty Shades of Awesome.  Not only did the USFSA have to grovel and kiss Johnny Weir's ass to come back over the last year, Mr. Lysacek continually pissed them off to the point that he had to switch agents to sufficiently kiss their asses again.  The USFSA is now acting as though they are a beautiful, accepting organization on par with the HRC and even refer to Johnny Weir as Johnny Weir-Voronov.  In my mind, the USFSA will soon be telling gay men to get back with their husbands because it makes them look more stable...the same way they strongly encouraged Tonya Harding to do so.  If skating was actually popular, we would see lovely fluff pieces with Johnny and Viktor and their dogs and all of that ostentatious furniture.  It would just like the Meno and Sand fluff pieces.  Johnny could so rock a Going to the Chapel vibe like Jenni Meno.

Today is most awesome because Johnny has two assignments, while Evan Lysacek has none.    It is quite possible that he could be given the third spot to Skate America, but they would usually announce him in this case.  I doubt that we will be done with Evan.  Like termites, taxes, Cher and Catholic guilt, he will always be with us.  Perhaps we will see him return on the all star edition of Dancing With The Stars?

Evgeny Plushenko doesn't have any assignments, but it is very likely he will be the TBD for Russia and the Rostelecom Cup (aka Cup of Russia.)  He likely doesn't want to have to deal with a second event or qualifying to the final, as he is trying to preserve his body for two more years.

The US Assignments

Full listings after the jump.







22 comments:

  1. I see the USFSA is still trying to make Dornbush happen. Ugh. I'd rather watch 10 back-to-back Evan performance than one of his. (And that's not saying much.) I wonder whose ass Dornbush is kissing?

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  2. Why all the Evan hate? I still think his Olympic short program, was flawless!! Ten times better, then that arm flailing, zero musicality Plushenko. With his horrible cherography. Other than his quads, I completely didn't get the hype. Johnny, Evan, & Jeremy Abott crush him artistically. I always thought it was like the Michelle/Sasha vs Irina thing. Beauty vs jumps/crap:) lol

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  3. There's just not much to get excited about with Evan, unless he improves artistically. What does he have that the others don't, on their good days? Very excited to see what Johnny brings.

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  4. Anon 7:28, are you suggesting that Evan Lysacek is an example of good musicality and inspiring artistry? Do you only watch US Network coverage? Because even Chan ubers are less delusional.

    If it ends up being Plushy vs. Chan at Rostel, the politikking will be epic. I can't wait for the battle of the federations.

    As for the rest, I wish they'd go back to bigger fields, but there's still a lot to look forward to.

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  5. Anon @ 7:39 a.m.: "What does he have that the others don't...?" Consistency. I'm not a big fan of his skating, but he can medal every time he's on the ice instead of our current crop of men, who, as artistic as they may be, get scared of their own shadows and implode if they didn't retie their laces 16 times or rub their special stuffed animal for good luck.

    I'm also excited for Johnny's return. I just hope he reads the rule book and decides to work within them rather than against them and then gripe about how the judges don't "get" him.

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  6. Alissa Czisny just one spot? OMG she really deserved the second spot, someone has to change Christina Gao for Czisny now.

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  7. @Ingriddiamond: Czisny requested the latest assignment because she's having surgery on her hip and will be off the ice for three months... http://www.chicagotribune.com/sports/globetrotting/chi-grand-prix-skate-gold-to-debut-in-canada-20120521,0,7208375.column

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  8. Last year, if someone were to have told me that in the next Grand Prix season, Caroline Zhang would have two grand prix assignments while Mirai and Alissa would each have one, I never would've believed it.

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  9. Is it wrong that I think Mirai or Czisny deserve two assignments?

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  10. Anon 11:20, Csizny asked for only one because of her injury and upcoming surgery. Hopefully she'll be able to skate at NHK.

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  11. It sounded like Czisny asked for the two last ones but only got one.

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  12. "I doubt that we will be done with Evan. Like termites, taxes, Cher and Catholic guilt, he will always be with us." Yay! May Evan always be with us! But if he does DWTS, I hope they give him a different partner. And may I remind your readers that after AJ saw Evan live at SOI last year, he praised his growth as a skater and said that Evan had finally won him over! AJ, those weren't sarcastic tweets, were they?? (I am usually very good at picking up internet sarcasm but no one is perfect!)

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  13. I don't believe I said he won me over. I was impressed with his growth, but I wouldn't put myself in fan status and I still dislike him as a person (what he projects at least.)

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  14. Read it and weep, AJ:
    http://www.twitter.com/AuntJoyce__/status/54409676116332544

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    1. One day so, the other day so! Pretty much Johnny Weir-style, he likes to contradicts himself!

      Oh, and check up what Mr. Weir said at least about Mr. Lysacek! About his marriage and Lysacek's reaction! Maybe you got problems than with your hate!

      I'm always impressed about the openness, tolerance and the understanding of the community! Why should it even be better than with the straight people, bigotry is everywhere ...

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  15. ^^ Lol, thank you for finding the incriminating tweet, Anon! I remember being quite surprised by the "won me over". That must have been one helluva Tango de Roxanne performance!

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  16. I will say he won me over on the night and I do like that program. While I'm mildly creeped out that you take my twitter that seriously to stalk it like that, I will say that it was very good. He skated with speed, power and more musicality than during his Olympic programs. I know I was very complimentary during my review. At the same time, I'm not an Evan fan for life or anything. I will say that I still like that Tango de Roxanne program and preferred it to Samson and Delilah in Boston. People were harping on fitness in another thread and I will say that evan's fitness level really shows when he skates with such speed and power. That music helps but he builds off of the music and it is up there with the best programs he has ever done. Love him of hate him, his Carmen was fantastic as well.

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  17. "I know I was very complimentary during my review."

    Actually, your praise was quite tepid. I was a bit disappointed, after that tweet. IIRC, the Evan part was mostly about Vera Wang acting drunk and crazy. It was hilarious!

    And I don't stalk your Twitter. I stalk Evan's Twitter. You tagged Evan in your tweet and that's how I came to read it. I do stalk your formspring though.

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  18. Why are the Shibs and D/W assigned to the same competition? I thought USFSA tries to space out their top skaters in the hopes of getting more podiums...

    I like Dornbush and hope he has a better year, but I never would have given him two assignments. Our men's stable is loaded with skaters just as mediocre who could use an international assignment too.

    Ando and Asada are still trying to make it happen and Suzuki is still plugging away. Guess Japan is hitting a "young phenom" drought too. I'm mildly shocked they gave Flatty a spot, but they must think she still has fans somewhere and might be betting on her to pull her famous consistency out (when she takes a break from her rigorous class schedule of Freshman English and Zumba) and save them for the Olympics. I hope they aren't putting too much pressure on Gold to become the "it" girl and save the franchise...headline perfect name or not.

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  19. Crap - on one hand I can't believe the USFA is subjecting us to Rachel Flatt again - on the other hand, its clear she has friends in high places who insist on enabling her continuing delusional inability to package herself.

    I'm not excited by the women in general though, my sentimental favorites are head cases Mirai and Alissa who only have one slot each. I hope Tut improves artistically and, that Mao can pull herself together and that out of the influence of Morosov Miki Ando will improve.

    I'm a lot more interested in the men: I'm sorry Joshua Farris was not given a slot or two. I don't think Dornbush is as terrible as some here do but he's hokey, not great and this year got worse instead of improving (as opposed to Miner, who may not be great either but whom I think improved and shows flashes of potential).

    Excited to see Weir and pray to god he keeps healthy. I have not been a fan of Lycecek, but agree with AJ that his very recent programs (which I've seen on youtube) show some real improvement artistically.

    I hope Oda can pull himself together someday - at his best he can be really great, but has such a hard time harnessing that - he makes Jeremy look like a model of consistency.

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  20. @Anonymous 7:28 AM ITA! Evan is the Olympic Champ. The haterz just need to deal already. I'm cautiously thrilled (I'm afraid of getting my hopes up)that Johnny will be back in the mix for the GP season. I hope he kicks ass!!

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