Shannon Miller and Dominique Dawes? They're 18. They're old! Put those haggard bitches in a home already. Mind you, both were injured and appeared utterly pissed for the entire competition. They must've overheard the commentators. It didn't matter that Shannon Miller rocked compulsories for the millionth time and was in the lead? She was going downhill!
No one gave a shit about the decorated veterans anymore. Bela was back! This time, he came with a child model. And being the media whore that he is, Bela told us she has the talent and focus of Nadia Comaneci, with the personality of Mary Lou Retton. "When I look at her, I see Nadia..." Yes, Bela has been working with Dominique since she was young. Night and day. Molding her. Wasn't he retired? Hell no, he was locked away in a gym fine tuning his latest princess!
Kerri Strug at Colorado Aerials, her 97th gym. No one saw her switching back to Bela a mile away...
And look at how much Mary Lee Tracy and Peggy Liddick adored the '90s fashion. Peggy never saw a scrunchie that she didn't like. It is good to know that her taste is consistent. Her favorite colors were established well before she shocked those Australian poppies and changed their national colors to pink and purple.
Steve Nunno, the '80s porn star/creepy gym teacher, never without a comment or correction. There is nothing like watching him given Shannon a last eulogy of encouragement prior to each and every apparatus. This angry Shannon showed just how much of it she'd been tuning out all those years.
NBC's coverage of this meet was oh so suspenseful. It was as though the editors of America's Next Top Model came to give Moceanu the winner's edit. Though I was rooting for Shannon at the time, it was obvious it was over. She was the Melrose. It was all about the girl in the red leo. And NBC's latest dopey interviewer ate it all up.
"Do you think you're born for greatness?"
You know she wanted to say yes.